Sis, Don't Get Caught Up... In Finding A Man

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Sis, Don't Get Caught Up... In Finding A Man

By: Timonshanae Wellmaker

The dating scene looks much different than it looked when our parents and grandparents were in their twenties. The entire concept of sliding in someone’s DMs, meeting someone through a dating app or even texting instead of picking up the phone to call whoever it was you wanted to pursue is still relatively new. However, with all of the things we can name that have changed, there are still a few golden rules we need to carry with us when it comes to romantic relationships.

Ladies, let’s get one thing straight. No matter how many things may have changed over time, one of the things that remains the same is this: you are the prize. Yes, you and only you. This is one of those sayings I hope you take to the grave with you because it still holds true to this day.

Let’s start by thinking about you, the woman reading this. Think of all you’ve got going for you, or even all that you could have going for you. Maybe you are pursuing a degree, a dream job, creating your own lane or taking a needed self-vacation. Whatever it is, understand that no man, and we are literally talking about a man here, can take that away from you. Sure, a partner- the right partner- can make experiences better by having someone to share it with, but with or without him you need to be completely whole in all that you are and all that you have.

If your conversations constantly revolve around a man or finding a man, do some soul searching and find out why this is such a substantial part of your world. Far too many women run themselves practically dry worrying about if they will ever find the right one. Guess what? It does not matter what they say the men to women ratio is or how much smaller the selection of men feels, it God has placed the desire in your heart to be with someone that means there is someone out there for you. It’s important to remember that worrying about something doesn’t help change the circumstances one bit; and worrying if you’ll find the right man isn’t healthy at all. Allow him to worry if he’ll find you. You are the prize and he should feel blessed to be in your presence!

Also, your vibe tells it all. Have you ever gotten hit on when you feel like you’re looking a mess? Maybe you made a late night stop in your sweats and found yourself the center of attention? Well, it’s all about energy. If you’ve learned anything about men you should know that they tend to be interested in a woman that isn’t breaking her heels just to walk his way. And while you might not be physically thirsty, your vibe tells it all. He knows.

You are in your twenties. You’ve got too much going for yourself to sit there and think you aren’t popping just because you don’t have a man. No man defines that. Focus on making yourself better for you, first. The time when it’s best for a man to be in that equation usually occurs when you feel perfectly fine without a man. Seek to want a man, love a man, but never need a man. The only man you need is God.

That man that you’ve been making up in your head over and over, he’s only a small part of the picture. Don’t miss out on the beauty of the rest of it because that’s the only piece your’e focus on.