How Being Selfless Can Affect Self-Love


How Being Selfless Can Affect Self-Love

By Monique Richardson

It’s the month of showing love and care. This is the time aside from year-end holidays and birthdays when we express our love and care. But what if we didn’t realize we were more concerned with the needs and desires of our loved ones and friends than we were about ourselves? This act would be called selfless.

A selfless act promotes happiness within another person or group of people without any personal gain, outside of the gratification from helping someone else, in return. Selfless acts are considered good deeds. But, what if we did this on a regular basis?

No matter the issue, you are the hero in someone’s life. Who is your hero? The hero and most important person is you. Despie it’s truth, not everyone realizes the imporotance of the hero. You can carry so many responsibilities, roles, and politics on our shoulders, it’s no wonder why you’re constantly forgetting yourself. We will explore how being selfless affects our ability to engage in self-love.

The “fixer” is the person who will place another’s problems on their own shoulders to alliviate and make them happy. A “fixer” will sympathize, feel pain, and struggle for someon else. Fixers would rather take it upon themselves to help without being asked, rather than to see other people experience negative emotions.

The “fixer” takes pride in being the person who friends and family can depend and call on when they’re in need. They’re the super hero without a cape. However, as selfless are they are, the “fixer” will eventually need a tune-up of their own. Unfortunately, a “fixer” doesn’t always have enough of the necessary experience with self-love to recognize the wear and tear that they endure whike trying to be everything to everybody. Not to imply they don’t have self-love at all, but rather it’s been ignored for so long that they my be out of practice when it comes to tending to their own needs.

Selflessness requires you to put your needs on the side for others. From parenting to relationships, being selfless is a part of our many roles in life. Just like any parent or partner, they need time to recuperate and recover from functioning in those multiple roles. Self-love helps us feel our need to care for ourselves and remind us that we are human beings with needs. On the other hand, being selfless can hinder self-love. Constant selflessness can cause us to ignore our needs. It’s our responsibility to treat ourselves the way we need to be treated; we cannot expect anyone else to handle this job. The way that we treat ourselves is the template for how we allow others to treat us. We must set a good example for others in this regard.

A person with self-love values their time and space. They will help people in need but with a limit. A limit provides a maximum amount of energy given to other people. Without the consideration of self-love, a selfless person wouldn’t have a limit on the amount of energy they give to others. Givers will pour their energy into someone to help them overcome an obsticle. This affects their emotions, thoughts, and even lifestyle. Self-love protects us from giving away our energy constantly to people who may be undeserving.

We are not in this world only to help ourselves. We are meant to help each other. It’s important not to confuse easing up on selflessness with selfishness. It is not a selfish act to take the time that you need to reguvenate and replenish yourself. This time will allow you to be more beneficial to others in the long run.

Being selfless is rewarding. We must learn to keep ours well-being in mind when being selfless. Self-love is what keeps us continuing to provide our helping hands to the world. It’s an art to care for yourself and others; master the balance and abundance in life is awaiting you in the future.